The B.K. Lounge

After finishing Paul Beatty's The White Boy Shuffle, I've moved onto Tuff, wherein the main character is seized with love at first sight whilst staring at the fly fry girl at a Burger King. I turn to the internet, and the first story I find staring back is news that Burger King is changing its slogan of 40 years; the royal Whoppers are moving from "Have It Your Way" to "Be Your Way." No doubt the stress of such a transition will weigh down on most of us.

I suppose all roads lead back to De La Soul.

fast food fiction

It was good to see the immortal Kentucky Fried Chicken making an appearance by Dave Newman's "She Throws Herself Forward to Stop the Fall," published on the Atticus Books website. This was on the same week that I made my at least annual pilgrimmage through Ha Jin's "After Cowboy Chicken Came to Town," my favorite fast food tale of all. It's a story I've taught for at least the past ten years.

I wouldn't want to minimize the brilliance of either Mr. Soul (as in De La) or Mr. Jin (as in Ha) when I fondly also recall my favorite fast food rap, De La Soul's "Bitties in the BK Lounge" and its deconstructive approach to gender and counter service. But of course, all of us in on the true know of all knows realize that a paltry hymn about whoppers and fries could never compare to Jin's ample paragraphs about fleshy fried white and dark meat and the transcontinental, globalized angst such grease could generate.

Years ago, inspired by my days of bussing of dishes, I wrote a meager tale called, "Waiters of the World Unite," but alas, it's either trapped in the lowest, least favorable spot in my storage space or else, sadly, it is gone for good.

Well, the world will go on, and that wasn't a true tale of fast food anyway. In fact, I was working at a middling but decidedly table-service restaurant.

Dinner?